If I Stand...

I originally posted this on March 26th, 2010.  I am reprising the post because I am currently in a Nehemiah precept class (Kay Arthur style), and we just hit Nehemiah chapter 8...

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I’m reading Nehemiah right now, and I’m in the middle of chapter 8 at the moment.  I had to stop and type, so that I would not forget what I just read…

Flashback:  The Israelites—in the promised land—had been majorly messing up—over and over again—and were becoming more and more wicked.  God finally got fed up and let them be overrun by bad guys.  They got kicked out of the promised land, and Jerusalem was totally destroyed.  I can’t explain why, but to me, this destruction of Jerusalem seems even more devastating than the flood in Genesis.  I actually cried when I read the end of 2 Kings.  I guess maybe it’s because this time around, the people didn’t just die off.  They had to keep living with the knowledge that it was 100% their own fault that their beautiful gift had been taken from them.      

Flashforward:  a bunch of years later, “Israelites: the Next Generation” are allowed to return to Jerusalem.  Their law has been lost.  They’d been claiming the title of Jew, but didn’t really have a clue what that meant. 

Ezra finds the Book of the Law and reads it to the people.  As he reads, the people weep.  Yes, I think they feel guilty for disobeying, but I also think that they are sad because they realize that they have not been fully living the lives that they had been given.  Ezra says “Do not mourn or weep.”  He uses the word “mourn”.  It’s like they are mourning the loss—or rather the non-existence—of their own lives.  (I myself have felt like that before.)  Anyway, he then says “Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.”  For some reason, this reminded me of what Pastor Bob said a couple weeks ago about how Satan uses our own guilt against us—he allows us to tell ourselves that we can never change, and that we have already condemned ourselves forever.  This sentence spoken by Ezra reminds me that guilt will never give me the strength I need to change.  Grief is only a hindrance.  Joy of the LORD is what gives me the strength to change.  “Then all the people went away to eat and drink…because they now understood the words that had been made known to them.”  My joy has truly increased these past 2 years, and I believe that a big reason for this has been my increasing understanding of the Bible.  Over and over again I have read about how these crazy Israelites completely destroyed THEMSELVES with their own sin.  I don’t think I can explain it.  I just…it is such a comfort as I discover how GOOD God’s guidance truly is.  I have been learning from first hand experience how much healthier and more pleasing life is when it is lived by God’s instructions.  Just knowing that every instruction was written for my own good is something very much worth being joyful about.